Negation.

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Things I should've done today but didn't:

1. My students' reports due this week.
2. Update my calendar.
3. Blog about something worthwhile that would give the fuckheads I call my friends something to read and entertain themselves with. (Haha I still heart you guys for being my emo dumpsite.)
4. Read a couple more chapters of Memoirs of a Geisha, which I've been trying to finish for the past three months already!

**
Things I shouldn't have done today but did:

1. Rearrange my books reverse-alphabetically.
2. Eat a shitload of chocolate.
3. Smoke that extra stick.
4. Rearrange my wardrobe according to frequency of use.
5. Thrown out a bunch of business cards I have no use for.
6. Get online.
7. Go to the park after work.

**
Things I shouldn't not have done but didn't do:

1. Honesty.
2. Finish a poem that I composed in my head that went like this:

My name is Presence.
I come in the form of all things.
I laugh inside the universe of a paper bag.
I beat the drums in the hoo hoo hoo.

3. Not cuss.

**
I'm falling behind on the blog count.

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OTHER POSTS BY NESSREEN:

#45 ~ V-Day

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Happy Valentine's Day, Bebi!  All the way from Jeddah. Coz Bebi, WE ARE CLEAR. While most of the world is celebrating love and commercialism, our Hay2a is busy prowling the streets ( again ) for businesses and individuals participating in this love-mongering, and preaching against this day. In the process, they have unwittingly been raising more awareness and promoting this holiday. Hilarity ensues. Great job on defeating your purpose(s)! On a lighter note, here's a great post from Sharifa's photo blog , and here is a song from the Backstreet Boys, for is there not a better time to unleash the boyband ballads than on an equally mushy day? You agree with me, of course. Enjoy! And if you're one-half of a couple, remember never to compare your relationship to others (because that's very unfair and stupid), and always make time to spend with each other. "Attention is truly valuable." - Seth Godin
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Eleanor.

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I got a pretty inspiring quote from a friend today. It goes: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." - Eleanor Roosevelt Now, that's quite true. A little insensitive to the little details of the things, people and situations that make someone feel inferior, but sure, she might truly be on to something here. The quote implies that everyone has (and can) control everything that goes on in their lives. That is of course, misleading. Human relationships and the human mind are both very complex and so intertwined that there is no way for anyone to be in full control of what or who makes them feel inferior. Therefore, it is important to remember that these quotes are not to be followed religiously in all aspects all the time. Think of it as a reminder to be aware of the things you can control so you may control them, and to eliminate those things you are able to eliminate so that you are not made to feel inferior. Eliminate. What will you be eliminating?
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Fear vs Faith

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We don't always know where our faith lies. Or even what it looks like. Or if it's ever enough to sustain us. We stumble around in our meaningless existence, with our gadgets and that endless babble of apps running in the background, straining against religion. "We are atheists!", we cry. Silently. We are not for the rigid walls of any religion, we don't subscribe to these restrictions, these violations on our freedom, these killings of our true selves. We are young, we are invincible. We are such strong people. We are so strong we refer to ourselves in the collective. There is no abstract idea that can break us, not words, not heartbreak, not betrayal, not fate nor any series of unfortunate events. Except maybe something so basic and so physical as literal, unbearable pain. And only then do we draw on our faith. "God SURELY wouldn't give me anything I wouldn't be able to handle. For He is All-Compassionate, He is Most Merciful." ...
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Band-Aided.

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When they said that Band-Aid s could fix anything, I didn't really believe it. Early this year, (a few months after I bought my laptop Olaf), I dropped my phone charger on it and the thin layer glossed over it acquired a tiny crack. Over time, the crack got bigger. I resisted the urge to put a sticker over it, mainly because the reason I loved Olaf so much was how minimalist and white it was. Anything would've distracted from this. Besides, there isn't a sticker cool enough to be on the cover of Olaf. (Yes, I mother it to death.) However, it really got worse. I had to do something. The solution? A nice kiddie adhesive bandage that I can remove anytime (in the event that I get tired of looking at it) without causing the crack to expand. Yes, Band-Aid AND Snoopy are always the best solutions. *** You know how sometimes you say the stupidest thing, and you realize that AS SOON AS YOU SAY IT, at that exact moment when you just can't take it back? Man, I hate that feeling. ...
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